


im a hard case (thats tough to beat)

by ThatWeirdGuyInTheBushes



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, Angst and Humor, Developing Friendships, Gen, Robots, implied/referenced panic attack
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-23 00:02:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30046845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatWeirdGuyInTheBushes/pseuds/ThatWeirdGuyInTheBushes
Summary: The first thing Kevin does when he crawls out of the vault is cough himself hoarse.He has no idea how long the dust has been sitting in his lungs, no clue how long he’s been alive. He doesn’t know what year it is, much less what day. All he knows is that he’s kneeling in a nuclear winter in jeans and a hoodie and he’s coughing his lungs out into the snow.Or, tales from the frozen wasteland.
Relationships: Daniel Condren & Kevin O’Reilly
Comments: 8
Kudos: 18





	im a hard case (thats tough to beat)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [KenkuKry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KenkuKry/gifts).



> Title from paradise city by guns and roses

The first thing Kevin does when he crawls out of the vault is cough himself hoarse.

He has no idea how long the dust has been sitting in his lungs, no clue how long he’s been alive. He doesn’t know what year it is, much less what day. All he knows is that he’s kneeling in a nuclear winter in jeans and a hoodie and he’s coughing his lungs out into the snow.

The second thing he does is think about how much better it would be if he was sleeping right now.

Suddenly, he hears footsteps crunching on the snow. Kevin turns, scrambling in the snow,  _ his fingers already going numb fuck what is he going to do- _

“Hello? Got any good reason for being out this far, Sir?” The man leans forward, hands on his knees. At least, Kevin assumes they’re a him. It’s well hard to tell, what with the dark, formless cloak and mask.

Kevin just stares. He probably looks like an idiot, sitting in the snow, gaping like a fish. “What year is it?” he asks, wincing at the scratchiness of his voice.

The man leans back. His mask rings a bell in Kevin’s head, but he can’t quite pick out the note of it. “2865. Are you a time-traveller or something?” The bird-beak mask suddenly turns, and Kevin realizes that it’s pointing at the disturbed snow and the vault door under it.

Kevin is going to have a panic attack. Jesus Christ, good lord, God, God, what does he do?

“Oh, shite. You’re a-?”

“Yeah.”

Oh. It’s a plague doctor mask. A silver, ornate, and entirely historically inaccurate one. Kevin doesn’t know why he’s so annoyed by that. There’s a distortion to the man’s voice that makes Kevin wonder if it doubles as a gas mask.

“You’re not- really?”

Kevin can’t really do anything but nod. This is not what he expected to wake up to.

(Technically, he woke surrounded by the skeletons of his fellow citizens, but that’s not something he wants to think about, right now.)

He holds out his hand, still sitting in the snow, his pants soaked through. “I’m Kevin.”

The man stares at the hand. He cocks his head to the side, an image that fits the bird mask rather well. After a long, awkward few moments, he grabs it and roughly tugs Kevin to his feet.

The world spins, and Kevin feels a little like vomiting. “I’m… Daniel. Are you human?”

Kevin chuckles nervously, beginning to wonder what he’s gotten himself into. “Unless my mom had a thing for aliens, I believe so.”

“Like, fully?” Nope. No, no, no. What the fuck. What the fuck. Kevin is going to have a panic attack. This is like getting hit by a car again, except with information, what the fuck. He can’t-

He can’t do much other than stare. “Yes.”

“Weird.” Daniel slips behind him and begins to push him forward. “So were  _ all  _ of you really human back then? No hybrids, no ghouls, nothing? How boring was that?”

“What the fuck does that mean?”

Daniel slings an arm over his shoulder, guiding him forwards. “Just weird is all. Don’t meet a lot of full humans these days.”

“So what are you?”

The bird mask turns so sharply it nearly whacks Kevin in the face. “Kind of a personal question for a stranger to be asking. Did they not have manners in the old world?”   
  


“You asked me!”

“And?” The confusion in Daniel’s voice is genuine. Kevin wants to hit his head against a tree.

“Why shouldn’t I get to ask you?”

Daniel shrugs. “Dunno. Just kinda rude. You’re new, I gotta ask.” Kevin shivers, teeth clicking together. It’s fucking cold out here. He’s gonna get hypothermia. If Daniel notices, he doesn’t say anything. What a gentleman.

“Can I have a coat?”

“You feel cold? Oh Lords and Ladies, I  _ really  _ thought that one was a myth. Yes, of course. Don’t want you dying on me.” Daniel shrugs off the big black cloak, throwing it over Kevin’s shoulders and then ploughing forward through the snow. His skin is still covered in black cloth. “Your biology is fascinating.”

Kevin, distantly, wants to cry. Just wants to sob and scream into his hands until things make sense again, or until he travels back in time. Fucking fuck.

But he’s way too cold and shocked to cry, so he doesn’t. He just follows in Daniel’s footsteps, fingers all fuzzy at the tips, until Daniel stops and Kevin bumps into him. “Welcome to my humble abode!” The man says, throwing out his arms, nearly whacking Kevin in the face with his beak when he turns.

The so-called humble abode is a door on the side of a mountain. Great. Wonderful.

Daniel opens it, ushering Kevin inside, which really makes him regret not appreciating it. The hot air that washes over him makes him  _ euphoric _ . He almost cries again.

It really is rather humble. Stone walls carved out into a room about the size of Kevin’s first apartment, a mattress in the corner and a crackling fireplace on the opposite wall. But he’s not cold anymore, so he’ll take it.

“You can go lay down if you like. But you have to tell me everything.” Daniel reminds him of an over-excited toddler, bouncing on the heels of his feet like that. It’s kind of funny.

Kevin collapses on the mattress, bones raw and aching. He hums a little in affirmation. “Your mask is inaccurate,” is the first thing that comes to mind.

“Mask?”

“Mhm. They were more leather. Not as-” he’s cut off by a long yawn- “not as pretty.”

“It’s not a mask.”

Kevin groans into his arms. Why can’t things stay at a normal level of weird? “What the fuck is it, then?”

“It’s just my face. Did everyone look like you back then?”

Kevin actually does start crying, then. It’s small, but it’s there. Fucking hell, he’s so lost. “No, but we were all- what are you, exactly?”

Daniel crouches down next to him and holds out a hand. “I am RT-600. I’m an artificial intelligence. I was made to treat the plague, but that didn’t work out too well. So now I’m here!”

Kevin thinks he must have gone crazy because the information hardly surprises him. “Oh. I’m Kevin.”

“You already told me that.”

“Yeah.”

“So,” Daniel says, “are you ready to tell me everything?”

Kevin flops back onto the mattress. “Well, we didn’t have robots.”

Daniel holds up a hand, sitting down next to the bed and rapping on the side of the bird mask. The empty pits of his eyes suddenly glow bright red. “Alright. I’m recording.  _ Now  _ you can talk. Tell me everything you remember. This is definitely going in my archives.”

**Author's Note:**

> leave a comment, mayhaps?


End file.
